Incontinence Is Fixable
Understanding What’s Been Missing
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00 INTRODUCTION
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00 INTRODUCTION
Welcome! I'm really glad you're here...
If you’ve been dealing with leaks, urgency, discomfort, or a growing sense that your body can’t be trusted the way it used to be, this course was created with you in mind.
For decades, women have been told a simple story: if you leak, your muscles must be weak. Do your Kegels, try harder, and push through. But for many women over 45, especially those navigating stress, hormone changes, or long-standing tension, that story is incomplete and often wrong.
This course is about slowing down, listening differently, and learning what your body has actually been asking for. There is nothing broken here. There is information you were never given, and together, we’re going to change that.
How To Navigate the course
LET'S GET STARTED
How to Navigate This Course
Before you begin, I want to make this very clear: there is no right or wrong way to move through this course.
This is not something you need to rush, complete perfectly, or push through. The goal is understanding, support, and rebuilding trust with your body. You’re in control of the pace.
Here’s how everything is set up so you always know where to start and what to do next.
Where to Start
Each module begins with a video, and that’s the best place to start.
The video gives you the big picture and helps you understand how the material fits together before diving into details. After watching the video, you can move into the written material for that module. It is below.
Asking Questions and Getting Support
At the bottom of each module page, you’ll find a comment box where you can ask questions or share what you’re noticing.
You can also reach out through the support page if you need help.
If something doesn’t make sense, if an exercise feels confusing, or if you’re unsure how to apply what you’re learning, use those spaces. You don’t have to figure this out alone.
Pacing the Course
You can move through this course at your own pace.
Some women move through a module in a day. Others take a week or longer. Many come back to earlier sections after something clicks later on.
You are allowed to pause, repeat sections, skip ahead, or take breaks. Progress here is about understanding and integration, not speed.
How Each Module Is Structured
Each module includes:
- A main video
- A written lesson, broken into sections
- An audio version you can listen to onsite. Just click play button.
- A downloadable audio version of the full written content.
- One or more printable handouts.
The written lesson is organized into expandable sections using dropdowns. Each section opens when you click it, so you can focus on one idea at a time without feeling overwhelmed.
Some modules include multiple handouts because different sections cover different concepts. You don’t need to use every handout right away. They’re there as tools you can return to when you need them.
Choosing Video, Reading, or Audio
I intentionally included video, written, and audio versions of the content so you can choose the learning style that works best for you.
- Start with the video if you want an overview
- Read the written sections if you like to go deeper or take notes
- Use the audio if listening feels easier or more relaxing
Some women use just one format. Others like to combine them. There’s no requirement to do all three.
Use what feels most supportive for you on that day.
Moving Forward When You’re Ready
Within each module, you move forward by opening the next section in the written lesson.
When you feel complete with a module, you can:
- Use the Next Module button (if available), or
- Return to the course menu or dashboard and select the next module
If you ever forget where you left off, simply return to the course dashboard. Everything remains accessible, and you can resume wherever you feel ready.
You don’t have to do this perfectly. You don’t have to understand everything at once. And you don’t have to push yourself. Listen to your body. Take what helps. Leave what doesn’t. You can always come back. When you’re ready, start with each Module by watching the video.
INTRODUCTION TO
PELVIC RESET METHOD
If You're Here, You've Already Been Alone for Too Long
If you're reading this, there's a good chance you've been dealing with something that's affected nearly every part of your life; yet you've barely told anyone about it.
Maybe it started small.
A little leak when you sneezed.
Nothing major.
Then it became... more. You started planning your day around bathroom locations. You stopped wearing certain pants. You declined invitations because the anxiety of "what if" felt heavier than the joy of going.
And somewhere along the way, you started to feel like your body; the same body that carried you through childbirth, career challenges, cross; country moves, and a thousand other mountains, had turned against you.
Let me tell you something right now:
Your body hasn't betrayed you!
What you're experiencing is your body's intelligent response to decades of pressure, stress, hormonal changes, and a medical system that gave you a one; size; fits; all answer that didn't fit at all.
This welcome module exists for one reason: to help you feel seen before we dive into the science.
Because if you don't first believe that you're not broken, that this isn't your fault, and that real change is possible, none of the information in the rest of this course will land the way it should.
Section 1: The Truth About What You've Been Carrying.
It's Not Just Physical
When we talk about incontinence, we tend to focus on the mechanics: the leaks, the urgency, the pads. But that's only part of the story.
The other part, the part nobody talks about, is what it does to your inner world.
Research from the International Urogynecology Journal found that women with urinary incontinence report significantly higher rates of:
- Social isolation and withdrawal
- Anxiety and depression
- Reduced Sexual Intimacy
- Lower overall quality of life scores
One study participant described it perfectly: "I became a detective of my own body, always scanning, always anticipating disaster. I couldn't just BE anywhere anymore."
Does that resonate?
The Silence Makes It Worse
Here's what many women don't realize: you are not alone in your silence.
Studies show that women wait an average of 6.5 years before seeking help for pelvic floor symptoms.
Six and a half years of:
- Thinking you're the only one
- Feeling embarrassed to bring it up
- Believing it's "just part of aging" and you should accept it
- Trying the same advice ("do more Kegels!") and feeling like a failure when it doesn't work
The shame around pelvic health is so pervasive that many women would rather suffer in silence than risk judgment, even from their own doctors.
But here's the truth: An estimated 25; 45% of women over 40 experience some form of urinary incontinence. That's millions of women. Your book club probably has three members dealing with this right now. Your yoga class. Your workplace.
What you’re experiencing has a context. Nothing about this means something is wrong with you. You’ve been isolated by a culture that treats women’s bodies as something to endure rather than understand.
Section 2: Why "Just Do Kegels" Wasn't Enough
Why "Just Do Kegels" Wasn't Enough
If you've been told to "just do Kegels" and felt frustrated when nothing changed, I want you to know: the problem wasn't your effort. The problem was the advice.
Here's what most doctors don't tell you:
The Kegel Paradox
Research published in the Journal of Women's Health Physical Therapy reveals something shocking: up to 30% of women cannot perform a Kegel correctly based on verbal instruction alone.
Even more surprising? Many women who think they're "doing Kegels" are actually bearing down (pushing out) instead of lifting up; which makes the problem worse.
But even if you ARE doing them correctly, there's a bigger issue:
Kegels address only one small piece of a much larger system.
Doing Kegels without addressing:
- How you breathe
- How you manage pressure in your abdomen
- Your stress levels and nervous system state
- Your hormonal changes
- Your hydration and tissue health
- Your posture and movement patterns
...is like trying to fix a leaky roof by painting the walls. You're working hard, but you're working on the wrong thing.
Why Your Doctor Gave You That Advice Anyway
Most physicians receive less than 2 hours of education on pelvic floor health in their entire medical training. And much of what they learn is outdated.
The "weakness model" of pelvic health, the idea that if you leak, your muscles must be weak, dominated medical thinking for decades. It's simple. It's easy to explain.
And it's wrong for many women.
Modern pelvic physical therapy research shows that for women over 45, especially those dealing with:
- High stress
- Hormone changes (perimenopause/menopause)
- History of chronic pain or tension
- "Type A" personalities who "push through"
... the problem is often overactive, tight, exhausted muscles that can't relax, not weak ones.
YOU weren't failing at Kegels. KEGELS were failing you.
SECTION 3: What Your Body Is Trying To Tell You
Your Symptoms Aren’t Random
They're not a sign that you're "falling apart." They're actually your body's way of sending you incredibly specific messages.
Let's decode a few:
Message #1:
"I Can't Keep Up With This Pressure"
If you leak when you cough, sneeze, laugh, or lift something, your body is saying: "The pressure in this system is too much for me to manage right now."
This isn't about weak muscles. It's about a pressure management system that's been overwhelmed: often by years of:
- Holding your breath during stressful moments
- Sucking in your stomach to "look thinner"
- Chest breathing instead of belly breathing
- Carrying chronic tension in your core
Message #2:
"My Nervous System Is Stuck in 'Guard' Mode"
If you have sudden, intense urges to pee; even when your bladder isn't full or if you feel like you "can't make it" once the urge hits, your body might be saying: "I don't feel safe enough to relax."
Your pelvic floor is deeply connected to your stress response. When you live in chronic stress (even low; grade, "I'm fine" stress), your brain keeps your pelvic muscles partially contracted: guarding, protecting, bracing.
Over time, this creates a high; tone pelvic floor: muscles that are so tired from never fully resting that they can't respond when you actually need them.
Message #3:
"I Need Different Support Now"
If you've noticed symptoms worsening around perimenopause or menopause, your body is saying: "My tissue structure has changed, and the old strategies aren't enough anymore."
The tissues of your urethra, vagina, and pelvic floor are packed with estrogen receptors. As estrogen declines, these tissues become thinner, drier, and less elastic.
This isn't weakness: It's a structural change that requires a different approach.
SECTION 4: The Real Cost Of Living This Way
The Social Cost
Before we move forward into solutions, I want to acknowledge what this has cost you. Because naming the cost is part of reclaiming your power
How many times have you:
- Mapped out bathroom locations before committing to plans?
- Worn only dark pants or skirts "just in case"?
- Declined a hiking trip, concert, or road trip because the anxiety wasn't worth it?
- Cut a good time short because you couldn't relax?
One woman in our research described it this way:
"I became half; present everywhere I went. Part of me was always monitoring my body, waiting for it to embarrass me."
The Emotional Cost
Living with incontinence often means living with:
- Hypervigilance: Your threat; detection system is always "on"
- Body mistrust: You can't rely on your body to behave predictably
- Shame spirals: Feeling like you're "too young" for this or like you've somehow failed at being a woman
- Isolation: Not talking about it with anyone, which makes it feel even more insurmountable
The Intimacy Cost
Many women report that pelvic symptoms affect their intimate relationships; sometimes drastically. Whether it's:
- Fear of leaking during sex
- Painful intercourse due to tissue changes
- Feeling "unsexy" or "broken"
- Avoiding physical closeness altogether
This isn't vanity. This isn't being "high maintenance." This is grieving the loss of ease in your own body.
And it's completely understandable.
SECTION 5: Why This Course is Different
Why Most Solutions Only Address Part of the Issue
If you’re here, chances are this isn’t the first thing you’ve tried.
You may have worked through apps, watched exercise videos, or followed advice from articles that promised improvement if you just stayed consistent. Maybe you were told to do Kegels. Maybe you were told to do more Kegels.
Some women are lucky enough to access pelvic physical therapy, and even then, the guidance can vary widely depending on the provider.
If things improved a little but never fully resolved, that doesn’t mean you failed. It usually means the approach didn’t match what your body actually needed.
So why should this be any different? Here's what makes this course unique:
We Start with Understanding, Not Just Exercises
Most programs jump straight to "do this exercise 10 times". But if you don't understand why you're doing it or how it fits into the bigger picture, you won't stick with it.
This course is designed to make you the expert on your own body, so you can make informed decisions and actually understand what's working (and what's not).
We Address the Whole System
You'll learn about:
- Pressure mechanics and breathing
- Nervous system regulation
- Hormonal changes and tissue health
- Hydration and inflammation
- Movement patterns and posture
Because your pelvic floor doesn't exist in isolation, and neither do your symptoms.
We Don't Shame You or Rush You
There's no "30-day cure!" promise here. No before-and-after photos that make you feel like you're not doing enough.
Healing isn't linear. Some days will feel like progress. Some days won't. Both are part of the process.
This course gives you permission to move at your own pace, skip around if you need to, and come back to sections when you're ready.
We Acknowledge the Emotional Reality
Pelvic health isn't just biomechanics. It's tied to how you feel about your body, your stress levels, your history, and your sense of safety in the world.
We won't shy away from that. This course holds space for the full experience, not just the "fix it" checklist.
SECTION 6: What To Expect & How To Use This Course
The Structure
This course has 5 modules, each with:
- A written lesson
- A companion video that walks you through the key concepts
- Printable handout to reinforce what you've learned
You can move through them in order, or jump to the module that feels most relevant right now. There's no "wrong" way to do this.
The Modules
Pelvic Health Basics Most Women Never Learn: We'll bust the "weakness myth" and show you how your pelvic floor actually works as part of a pressure system
Hydration Myths That Make Symptoms Worse: Learn why "drink less water" is terrible advice, and what actually helps
Inflammation, Tissues, and Pressure: Understand how chronic inflammation, tissue health, and hormones all contribute to symptoms
Supportive Daily Practices: Small, sustainable changes that regulate your nervous system and support tissue health
Your Personalized Reset Path Troubleshooting, adapting, and creating a plan that fits YOUR life
How to Get the Most Out of This
Give yourself permission to:
- Pause and take notes
- Cry if something hits hard
- Skip a section and come back later
- Disagree with something and trust your own body's wisdom
- Take a break if you feel overwhelmed
Remember:
- You don't have to do this perfectly
- Progress isn't linear
- Small changes compound over time
- You're allowed to need support
SECTION 7: A FEW GROUND RULES BEFORE WE BEGIN
A Few Ground Rules Before We Begin
- This Is Not Medical Advice
I'm sharing evidence; based on education and practical strategies, but this course doesn't replace individualized care from a pelvic floor physical therapist or physician. If you have severe prolapse, chronic pain, or symptoms that significantly interfere with daily life, please seek professional evaluation.
- Your Body Is the Final Authority
I'll give you frameworks and information, but you know your body best. If something doesn't feel right, trust that. If a suggestion doesn't work for you, that's date; not failure.
- Healing Takes Time
You didn't develop these symptoms overnight, and they won't resolve overnight either. But with consistent, informed action, change is absolutely possible.
- You Deserve Support
If you need to reach out, ask questions, or share your experience, do it. Use the feedback options. Talk to a healthcare provider. Find a community of women who get it.
You don't have to do this alone.
SECTION 8: Pause & Breathe
One More Thing Before Module 1
I want you to take a breath.
A real one. In through your nose, filling your belly. Out through your mouth, letting your shoulders drop.
Now I want you to say this out loud (yes, really):
"My body is not broken. I am not broken. I deserve to feel comfortable and confident in my own skin".
Even if you don't fully believe it yet, say it anyway. Because the women who heal aren't the ones who never doubt themselves,they're the ones who keep showing up even when it's hard.
You've already taken the first step by being here.
Let's keep going.
Reflection Questions
(Journal Prompt or Just to Think About)
Before moving into Module 1, take a moment to reflect:
- What made you finally decide to seek help/try something new?
- What would it feel like to trust your body again?
- If you could wave a magic wand and change one thing about your pelvic health, what would it be?
- What do you need to believe about yourself to move forward?
There are no right answers. Just yours.
What's Next?
In Module 1, we're going to dismantle everything you thought you knew about pelvic health; starting with the myth that "weakness" is the problem.
You'll learn about the pressure system, the three layers of your pelvic floor, why your breathing matters more than you think, and how your nervous system might be the missing piece in your healing.
It's science; backed, but I promise… it's also empowering.
Ready? Let's go.
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